Here Is The Man Love

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I was just visiting SI.com, Sports Illustrated’s website about sports, believe it or not.

Anyway, on the front page, I saw two articles about pretty women in sports. One was about beautiful women “on and off the  basketball court” and the other was strictly about the 20 prettiest women in tennis.

Now, as a straight man, my first and lazy instinct is to not really be offended by the objectification of women as it seemingly doesn’t directly affect me, but ultimately I decided that those articles might be annoying to people. Not so much the articles when examined individually, (I didn’t even read them) but the misrepresentation that clearly exists; it’s no question that males dominate pro sports and SI.com’s content, but you find TWO separate articles about pretty women athletes against zero words about pretty men.

Where’s the man love?

Here it is. Here is the man love.

At this point, I’m tired and I’ve already mostly assembled this thing made up of eight dudes. I can’t think of anymore. I was hoping to get more meat up in here but can’t right now lol.

So, here, for modern times, is a small grouping of the most handsome men in sports. Beginning with Yankees great, Mike Mussina:

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Nobody looked better in pinstripes than The Moose. I mean, he looks like the guy from Lost, except he can pitch like a boss for ya in the playoffs. Lost‘s Matthew Fox’s athletic career ended as a collegiate football player. Ain’t quite the same as pitching in the house Babe Ruth built. Mussina is the first guy I thought of when I came up with the idea for this post. Ladies, what do you think?
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Pudge Rodriguez was almost as fine looking as his throw to second-but not quite, which is why this muy caliente bad ass is a future Hall-Of-Famer.

 

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Xavier Nady didn’t have the most remarkable career, but he’s damned handsome and when I went on my first date with the girl who would become my first girlfriend, Nady showed up on the Jumbotron and Amy said “Ooooooh, who’s that???” I told her that his name was Xavier Nady and that he kind of sucks (He didn’t suck. In reality he had serious power and just never fully actualized, as some players don’t. Such is baseball and such is life.) Amy mistook me for saying that it sucks that she thinks he’s cute when I meant that he just sucked as a player (again, sorry X, I was talking out of my ass.) I mumbled “kinda sucks” or something. Anyway, Amy read my reaction as insecurity and squeezed my arm and smiled. So, not the best career, but after that first date I always followed Nady. He was soon traded from the San Diego Padres and became a sort of journeyman throughout his rocky ten-year career, during which he displayed his talent in spurts and had some decent times with the Mets and Yankees in New York. In my opinion the Padres should have parked him in left field for a decade. I think he just needed to be in a comfortable situation. But what are you gonna do? Hey, ten years in The Bigs ain’t a bad way to make a living.

 

I don't follow basketball quite as much but I always thought Melo was a sexy man.
I don’t follow basketball quite as much but I always thought Melo was a sexy man.

 

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I might be biased here as we’re talking about my favorite baseball player of all time, but this fool had the body to match! Thanks to a huge German momma who fed this diamond menace like a thoroughbred, he was built like a linebacker (actually he played running back for Columbia.) I think Lou looks a little like Paul Newman. Admittedly, nobody on Earth is as good-looking as Paul Newman.

 

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This might be another instance of bias, because all I really see when I look at Jackie Robinson is H-E-R-O.

 

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If I have a son, and his mother permits, he will be named Ayrton. Senna makes a good case for doing what you love as best as you can, even if it is silly and childish, like driving race cars. He is beloved by his nation of Brazil and a global community of racing fans because of his unparalleled passion and talent. It’s possible that he could not have left a greater impact on humanity doing anything else. And he was quite the ladies’ man.

 

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